Posts

Diabolical Tulips and a Toot

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 As Logged By: Agent Rose    My first time gardening on Mother's Day Was such fun that I shouted, "Hurray!" Colorful tulips were planted here and there So many, it could feed a bear!   I can't stop looking at the cute bunny He's acting so adorably funny. Until he eats a tulip in one chomp! This baby's mad!  I'm about to stomp!    Look at those beauties!  Look at them!   Red, purple, and blue.  Plus yellow, orange, and multicolored, too!   It's a carpet of tulips!  So many I could go for a swim, so many it looks like a never ending sea, so many it could feed a bear.  Well, maybe.  I decided to put aside my diabolical side this Mother's Day and helped Mommy in the flower beds.  I could have thrown dirt down her pants, I could have hidden her tools so she couldn't find them, but I didn't do any of it.  This diabolical sweetie decided to just be a cute, normal sweetie for the day.   And I am so glad I did! ...

A Diabolical Mother's Day

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 As Logged By: Agent Chase   Mother's day is finally here! And what does Mommy want this year? Nothing more than to relax and sleep. She's hoping for me not to make a peep.   Me be diabolical on Mother's Day? Mommy's expecting it, did she say?  Do I promise not even to make a toot? HA!  That would be a hoot!   Happy Mother's Day, Mommy!   Pop, pop, smash.  Pop, pop, crash!  Pop, pop, bing, bang, boom, BASH!   "Chase, I haven't even had a chance to take a sip of coffee," Mommy groans.  "How have you already gotten every pot and pan out?  Don't you know it's Mother's Day?"   Yes, of course I know it's Mother's Day.  Why else would I be playing such a diabolically musical masterpiece?   Pop, pop, ding-a-ling...   HEY!   Daddy has come to save the day.   "Sorry, Chase, but today is Mother's Day," he says as he takes away my wooden spoons.  "And Mommy wants nothing more than to relax and catch up o...

Diabolical Spaghetti

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 As Logged By:  Agent West   I could wear it in my hair Or stuff it in Daddy's underwear. Let's plop a glob on the floor  And add another and some more!    Mommy's screaming as she's slipping. Daddy's running is mostly tripping.  Who will fall on the floor first? Uh oh, now my diaper's burst!  It's spaghetti day!   I love spaghetti.  I do, I do, I do.  It's squishy and sticky.  Perfect for this diabolical dude.   "Make sure you actually eat some this time," Mommy says with a pointed look.   Don't worry, Mommy.  I always make sure I eat some of your spaghetti.  It's so creamy and rich, just perfect to pinch.   I squeeze some between my fingers, but Mommy is watching.  Down the hatch!  I happily chew and gulp it down.   Mommy gives a satisfied smile and turns around.   Perfect timing, Mommy.   I was feeling ready for a change in hair styles.  Another big, big, big, big pinch....

A Diabolical Stomach Bug

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As Logged By: Agent Rose   Painful insides and running fever This diabolical cutie needs a reliever Not a bit of food can I eat Without it coming up in a great feat.    A trip to the hospital? Anything to stop it all. Should I eat along the way? And make a great, pukey display.   Oh, yes.  It got me.   It really, really did.     The coughing, the puking, the tender tummy, the gas.  The pooping!   Oh, the pooping.    Oh, the puking! "Is she keeping anything down?"  Daddy asks after tiptoeing to my bed.   "Nothing.  Let's check her fever."   Mommy and Daddy get the thermometer.  I try to wriggle away as they press it against my ear.  No!  I don't want my temperature taken.  I push it away, only to push too hard.   PPPPHHHHHFFFFFFFRRRRRTTTTTTHHHHHTTTT!   "Wow!  That one smells like forgotten scrambled eggs," Daddy gags and takes a step back.   "Poor thing," Mommy pouts....

A Totally Non-Diabolical Easter

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 As Logged By:  Agent Chase   An Easter celebration with family Can be crazy with my Uncle Stanley. He plots and schemes on where to hide The eggs filled with goodies inside.   I do love a bit of fun So I've made some eggs for everyone. A little surprise awaits them all. Did Uncle Stanley take a backward fall?   Ah, a sunny day and family all around.   Don't worry, Daddy.  Don't you fret, Mommy.  This diabolical mastermind has no intentions of pulling off any dastardly mayhem.  My diabolical schemes are special, just for you.   Easter celebration is the best.  He is risen.  Yes!   What a way to celebrate than by filling Easter eggs and hiding them all around?  I dare say, I might like searching through the ground.  Especially, if I find any chocolate with peanut butter filling inside.     "Don't let the kids see where I'm going!"  Crazy Uncle Stanley hisses as he darts past with a bag full of...

Diabolical Green Tomatoes

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 As Logged By: Agent West  Planting season is here at last, So Mommy's having a big old blast. Tomatoes, cucumbers, and radishes.  Oh, my! It's too much for this diabolical guy.   The tomatoes?  I wouldn't touch those! Not even with Granny's water hose. Where are those bright red globs? All I see are stringy, green blobs.    Mommy is at it again.  She has her seeds, her pots, her tools, and her dirt.   That awesomely awesome dirt.   But!  I've learned my lesson.  Don't pull the seedlings.  Even if they don't look at cool as the coolness of dirt.  Don't pull the seedlings!   The dining table is filled with trays.  Some for cucumbers, yuck!  Some for flowers, meh.  Some for radishes, oh no.  One touch from a warm day and they turn into firecrackers of spicy heat!   There's no room to play.  There's no room to run.  There's no room to throw spitballs, or toot bombs, or have any typ...

Another Diabolical Chicken Soup for the Soul!

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 As Logged By: Agent Rose Agent Rose's Mom    I typed and typed and typed away. Chicken Soup for the Soul accepted it, hurray! Rosie doesn't care a lick She just wants to poke it with a stick.   Knock, knock on the door? Is Grampa in an uproar? A story about him is in a book! Watch him go completely bazook!  "Yes, Dad," I say into the phone.  All the while, I'm keeping my eye on a certain little lady whose hand keeps diabolically reaching into a nook that must be hiding something sneaky.  "The title is Chicken Soup for the Soul:  What I Learned from My Dog ."  "You say it's the story about me and Tank?"  He giddily asks and I try to remember when was the last time I heard him this excited.  "Where can I buy it?"   "It's available at Amazon and Barnes and Noble , but I have your copy here."   CLUNK!   The phone lines drops.  Am I concerned?  Of course, I am!   Dad almost had a heart attack last Christma...