Will Stand for Peanut Butter

-

As Logged By:

Agent Rose

 

  Peanut butter is gooey and sticky

And clings to my chin.

At first peanut butter felt real icky,

But one taste and I had to grin.

 

Daddy thinks it's out of my reach.

That silly, silly man.

I guess I'll have to teach

that this diabolical sweetie can stand!

 

We babies know a lot more than Mommies and Daddies think.  Our wants may be simple, but our thoughts are diabolically unique.  Of course we know how to sit and stand, though we enjoy being carried around.  And we also know that the longer we make Mommy and Daddy wait for us to sit, stand, and walk, the giddier they'll become.

The more at our mercy they will be!

A case in point happened just this week:

I have purposefully been holding off standing because Daddy has become rather antsy to have me start walking.  He still loves to carry me, but I've heard him on the phone.  I've heard him using my accomplishments as rights to brag.

And don't for a moment think that this sweetie is willing to jump through any hoops to boost Daddy's bragging ability.  I'm a sweetie, but a diabolical one.

Wait a minute!  What is this?!

I have found my Daddy sitting on the floor and what is in his hands?  A jar of peanut butter with a spoon to scoop.

My mouth starts to water, my heart skips a beat.  Of all the diabolical weaknesses in the world, why does mine have to be peanut butter?  Second only to tea.

"Oh no, Rosie," Daddy lifts the jar when I crawl over for a taste.  "The doctor said that you are only to have a little smear.  Just a taste."

Smear, schmear!

I remember that first smear.  I had giggled and grinned so much at the deliciousness of that peanut buttery taste that Mommy and Daddy couldn't stop and this baby became covered in it.  Ahh, that was a good day.

But when I reach out my hand, Daddy continues to pull it away.  Oh really, Daddy?

Well!  Two can play at this game!

"Honey," Mommy nudges Daddy with her foot.  "What's she doing?"

"I think she's trying to stand," Daddy only barely gasps.

I wobble.  I rock.  I steady myself.

"Oh my goodness!  She's standing!"  Mommy runs to grab the camera.

"I think she's wanting the peanut butter."  Daddy lifts it further out of my reach.

Now, pay attention!  For next up is the diabolical genius of this girl's plan.

I reach my hand out even further, daring to take a step as I do.  Daddy's head looks about to explode and Mommy continues snapping away.  But!  Oh, no!  This cute and innocent sweetie can't take a step and keep her balance. 

Down I plop on the ground only to immediately start "trying" again to stand.

"No, Rosie.  You can't have any peanut butter," Daddy protests when I reach again.

"Give her the peanut butter!"  Mommy declares with a warning kick.

And thus, this cuddly bunch of cuteness has proven that being a diabolical baby results in getting her peanut butter and eating it too.

Upcoming Log:  Stirring a Poopy Potty
Previous Log:  What Mommy and Daddy do While I Nap

Comments

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

Diabolical cabbage and beans

-
Image
 As Logged By: Agent Chase With   The Puppy The Puppy was right, I admit There was no way to go through with it. Getting everyone to eat cabbage and beans Would have been impossible, by all means. However, we’ve devised another plan. In this temporary truce between dog and man. The Puppy has many friends, you see. Who are willing to eat cabbage and beans, whoo wee!     For weeks I have been saving every scrap of Mommy’s famous cabbage and beans dish, keeping none for myself.  (Not that I want any after the last gas catastrophe.) The toy bin is filled to the rim and it’s starting to smell, but the Puppy reassures me that his friends will still dig in. “Oh, Marge, this was a wonderful idea,” one of Mommy’s friends says as she waves her hand around. “A block party for everyone and their dog. How did you think of it?” “It’s the funniest thing. I saw Chase playing with a magazine that happened to have an article about throwing one of these.”
Read more

Throwing food? I'll give it a try!

-
Image
 As Logged By: Agent Rose Please! Don’t mention eating. Not after Agent Chase’s stink infested beating. Cabbage and beans! Were there no other ways? The stink never ended for days and days! My tummy is tumbling and swirling. I fear anything I eat, I’ll end up hurling. But, I do love being a sweetie that’s diabolical. Especially, when I can do something so maniacal!     Agent Chase is going to get a stink bomb in the face! Joining with the Puppy!? Of all the diabolical schemes. She should have known that teaming up with the Puppy would make her diabolical plans explode. “Okay, Rosie. Time for some dinner.” Dinner? No way! My tummy is still too tender for any dinner. “Come on, Sweetie. You need to eat or you’ll get grumpy.” I stare at Daddy with the angriest of angry faces. Grumpy!? Does he have any idea what horrors I’ve been through? Just thinking of it makes my tummy tumble some more. The stink of dog doodie
Read more

Crazy plant lady Mommy

-
Image
 As Logged By: Agent West   Why is Mommy sneaking around Like a thief stealing steaks by the pound? What is that in her hand? A seed catalogue named Plant Land? Should I follow this crazy looney Who’s humming an interesting tuney? I’m scared to see what she’s up to. Especially, when she’s talking to Aunt Sue. What in diabolical diaper names is going on? I’m so confused, I’m completely pooped out. Something is wrong with Mommy. Something’s snapped, for sure! She’s gone batty, insane. She’s sipped one too many, eaten her last sanity cookie! Don’t believe me? “Here’s the mail,” Dad calls as he comes in the door and slaps a wad of folded papers onto the dining table. Bills, letters, nothing interesting of the sort. No diabolical packages. No stink bomb greeting cards. “Where is it?!” Mommy frantically races into the room with her phone to her ear and claws through the pile of mail. Her mouth practically foaming! “I can’t find it,
Read more