You ate chocolate without me!?
As Logged By:
Agent Chase
When baby's stuck at home
Eating mushy Brussels sprouts
That taste like gooey foam,
She starts considering Mommy's whereabouts.
Where else would Mommy be
Than at Agent West's house
Eating sanity cookies with glee?
Now she's about to get doused!
I might be ready for bed. I might be tired. But that doesn't mean I'm going to go to sleep. Mommy's been gone since my midday nap and now I hear Mommy's car driving in the garage. This diabolical mastermind wants to know where she's been.
"You're back late," Daddy greets her as I listen in.
"I couldn't help it. We had to make another batch of her cookies," Mommy confesses with a giggle.
Cookies? Cookies? Which cookies are these? Wait a minute...
SHE ATE CHOCOLATE WITHOUT ME!
Mommy sneaked over to Agent West's house whilst I innocently napped and enjoyed his Mommy's chocolatey chocolate sanity cookies.
Wait, calm down Agent Chase. Maybe Mommy brought some sanity cookies back.
I climb out of my crib. I crawl across the floor. I push open the door to see Mommy standing not a few feet away.
"Hello, Chase. Mommy's home," she picks me up and gives me a squeeze.
But of the chocolatey chocolate cookies, there are none to see!
What!?
She brought not one back!? Not even for me?
"Goodnight, Sweetie," Mommy whispers while laying me down to sleep, completely oblivious to the raging steam boiling inside me.
This little, diabolical baby is mad. MAD I tell you! What a dastardly deed. What horrible nonsense!? Mommy is going to pay for this. Yes. She. Is.
It is time to unveil my newest invention. It is time to make Mommy pay like she has never paid before!
MWAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I reach under my pillow. I grab the lever. The secret compartment in my crib opens to show my latest pride and joy, joy, joy.
Behold - My Stink Infested Dousing Gun 2000!
Big deal? You say.
Another fart sprayer - who cares?
Oh no, no, no. This is no ordinary stink machine. This doesn't merely throw another fart in Mommy's face. No, no, no. Her smelling senses have grown too accustomed for that.
The Stink Infested Dousing Gun 2000 can detect the exact smell that will make your knees buckle and mouth gag. It knows exactly which stench you fear the most.
And Mommy is going to be test subject number one...
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