Diabolically stealing my leftovers

 As Logged By:

Agent West

I could have sworn there was more stew

With delicious beef that cleared my blues.

But when Mommy opened the fridge

There was none for me to binge!

What about a grilled cheese?

Smashed, loaded, and coated to please.

Is there any more of that?

Or is Mommy sneaking some in her hat?

 

 

Oh, the hunger pains. The growling tummy, the rumbling stomach.

If I don’t eat soon, the gas will come forth.

Not the funny toots in Mommy’s face gas, either. But, painful, stuck in your tummy and refusing to come out or budge gas that can only be cured with chamomile tea.

Agent Rose may love it, but I’m a diabolical dude! I want my beef stew!

Where is it, Mommy? Don’t make me beg. Don’t make me cry. Don’t make me let out a toot that’ll knock your socks to the moon!

“Are you hungry, West?” Mommy coos, completely oblivious to the hungry beast about to be unleashed.

“Ah!” I let out as a warning and point to the fridge.

Mommy opens the door and looks around. “Sorry, little guy. We don’t have any left overs. How about a jar of creamy bananas?”

Creamy bananas?! I want my beef stew. I know it is in there. I know it!

Mommy made a fresh batch yesterday. I remember it clear as day. She blendered my serving, which I ate with great haste and finished off with a burp worthy of a truly diabolical dude, then she put the rest away. In a big tub with a purple lid.

The same kind sticking out of Mommy’s beach hat.

...

Sticking. Out. Of. Mommy’s. Beach. Hat.????????

As Mommy goes to the pantry to pull out that jar of creamy bananas, I quietly crawl my way over to her beach hat. This is not an easy task for a diabolical dude who loves making as much noise as possible, but I manage to tip toe on hands and knees without Mommy any the wiser.

“There’s also a jar of pureed peas,” she calls from the pantry, completely ignorant of my current mission.

I check that the coast is still clear and peek over the large rim of Mommy’s beach hat. Sitting inside is the lid and container. Only, it is completely empty. A spoon rests beside it, so I take it in my hand and lift it for a sniff.

Yummy beef, with potatoes and carrots.

“West, what are you… Uh oh.”

Uh oh, indeed, Mommy! Uh oh, indeed!

Agent West to Agent Chase, prepare for news of a diabolical revenge.

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