Diabolical Cuteness

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 As Logged By:


Agent Rose


I've been caught sneaking pie

That was meant for the Diabolical Drei.

Mommy thinks I want to eat it,

When really I want to fling it!


Agent West ignoring me?

I'll get him back, you'll see!

A pie in the face is such a classic.

It's diabolicalness will be galactic!


Nothing beats a Mississippi mud pie, especially when made with real, sticky and stinky mud.

A few pebbles thrown in, too?  

Why not?!

A few blades of grass and a dead bug will make this pie a blast.

Why am I making a pie like this?  Because that no good, meanie poop Agent West has decided that he's going to ignore me! 

That's right, this pie is not going to Mommy and Daddy.  This pie is going to go straight to the Diabolical Drei headquarters, where I will smile diabolically cutely when Agent West takes a bite and promptly spits it all out.

Or maybe...

I'll throw it straight in his face!

"Ooh, is someone making mud pie?"  Mommy coos and kneels down to sit with me on the ground.  "Let's see, you have mud, pebbles, grass, and...  Oh, how nice.  You found a dead bug."  Though Mommy looks ready to puke, she keeps her smile very forcibly wide.  "I'm sure that will taste good.  Are you ready to dig in?"

Dig in?  Are you crazy?!

I have no intention of eating this.  I...

Mommy proves my ignorance when she takes a pretend spoon in her hand and proceeds to pretend eat the muddy confection.  

"Om nom, nom," she goes.  "Om nom, nom."

Um, why not?  I go along with the pretend game.  I grab my pretend spoon and eat up, too.  I smile my cutest smile, I bashfully blink away and giggle.  All the way through our pretend game.
 
Anything to make sure Mommy doesn't find out what I really intend to do with it.

"Look who's here," Mommy says and stands up to greet Agent West and his mom as they come up the side walk.  "We were just enjoying some old fashioned mud pie."

"Mud pie?  My favorite!"  Agent West's mom declares with an obvious mock smile.  "How about it, West?  Are you ready to dig in?"
 
Agent West's mom sits him down directly in front of me, so I make sure to give him a frown.  He cocks his head as if confused, so I get furious.  Extra furious.  Extra, while still looking cute, big time furious.
 
Do you know what I decide to do?
 
Kapow!
 
I throw my mud pie right in his face!  Mud oozes out from the sides and drip down his chubby cheeks.  Grass blades poke out to make him look like a little, green lion.  Best of all, when the small pie plate falls off his face, the dead bug is plastered right there, on the side of his cheek.
 
Like a little buggy kiss.
 
Diabolical cute quest a success!
 
 
Upcoming Log:  An Ode of Diabolical Confusion
 

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